This week’s podcast episode was to help children feel happier about going to school.
I’ve had some lovely feedback, but what about the rest of their little lives?
What is the cost of your child’s happiness?
It’s priceless. It’s intangible. It’s immeasurable.
Happiness is NOT a place you arrive at. It’s a place you discover inside of yourself.
Some of the ways you can create your own happiness:
- getting to know and understanding yourself
- taking time for self-care and self-compassion
- being a good communicator
- understanding how your mind works (your thoughts drive your feelings)
- being connected to yourself and your feelings (your feelings drive your behaviour)
- hanging out with the right people and nurturing healthy relationships
- having a loving and kind community or support network (that may be your family or a family you create for yourself)
I’m not a Fairy Godmother!
Last time I looked, I had NO magic wand. Although the kids have some incredibly kind things to say about me and there is a certain magic about coaching which remains a mystery to me.
What I do have is years of experience of working with children; seeing patterns in families, watching history repeat itself over and over again. Not to mention my laser sharp intuition, ninja problem solving skills and big heart. It gets results because the kids want to feel that connection with somebody who gets them.
Yes I know you do and that’s often frustrating, but they tell me; ‘Of course, my Mum thinks that she’s my Mum!’
Do you think coaching is expensive?
I remember once, one Mum wrote in her feedback questionnaire that she was grateful for all the help and support I had given her daughter who had acute anxiety which morphed into panic attacks. It was preventing her from getting on public transport and feeling safe at school. In her mind, coaching had been a huge success
…..and then came the BUT. It was expensive.
Now I can totally see where she might be coming from – 3 months of coaching at £1,000 may sound expensive to some.
….and here’s my BUT(!) I wrote back to her and asked her:
‘What is the cost to you of your daughter having her peace of mind back? How much would you pay for her to be panic free and know how to deal with any anxiety should it arise again?’
‘When you put it like that, it’s not expensive at all.’
Uh-huh. Yep. It’s not expensive at all to get your life back. And that’s what I do.
I give kids the courage + freedom to be themselves
My wish for kids to grow up equipped for the tricky stuff and feeling empowered to deal with it. Cos they’re gonna have to. Come to think of it, when you look at some of my lower priced products Smiley Sweet Dreams, Be Your Own Best Friend, How to Tame Your Angry Dragon, you can learn it for yourself for under £100.
Yes you really can! You can do for yourself. I have every faith in you.
How much do you value your emotional wellbeing?
People think nothing of spending £500 on holidays, on their kids education, on afterschool clubs, toys, birthday parties, dental care, healthcare, cars and so on.
I’m not going to tell you how to prioritise your spending because that’s none of my business but I would ask you to look at your priorities.
Are you going to break the cycle?
Do you have what it takes to discover your own kind of happy for your family?
I hope so. I never lose hope. I’m always hopeful that parents will choose to overlook their issues or their needs temporarily to give their child the very basics for growing up happy.
You need to because in my mind, the evidence is such that you CANNOT afford to play Russian Roulette with childhood because childhood trauma is at the core of all grown-up heartbreak. We KNOW it’s mostly nurture and not nature. Check out the statistics in this blog post.
Reality check: One adult therapy session = £50 or worse still: years of therapy because you didn’t get your emotional needs met growing up= £10,000 pounds and years of your life trying to figure it all out!
What’s your excuse?!
Don’t worry we all have one. In this blog post, I highlight the most common excuses which are actually just your fear keeping you stuck. I was speaking to a Mum about the cost of coaching last week.
I’m going to be BRUTAL here: any budgetary barriers are a BLOCK.
There is so much free stuff on my website and learning to help you find your own kind of happy (and to help your child discover theirs). It’s totally down to you to Discover your Family’s Own Unique Recipe for Happiness. Amongst some of the things I’ve tried: I’ve watched countless YouTube videos, read books, been to seminars, had therapy, had healing, been to yoga, listened to podcasts, been to healers and journaled.
Helpful suggestions to kick start your coaching on a shoestring!
1) Check out the TRULY MADLY SMILEY PODCAST and let your child get to know me.
2) Check out my BLOG – it’s packed full of helpful articles to make you think. Awareness is the key to change and doing things differently.
3) Check out all the FREEBIES.
4) Buy a box of SMILEY THOUGHT CARDS and learn how to develop a growth mindset.
5) Read my BOOK ‘Stuck Between Two Worlds’ and learn how Ruby finally finds friends who get her.
6) Download a SMILEY COACHING CLASS, there are 19 to choose from. Your child will thank you for it because they will feel less anxious and much happier as a result.
7) Visit the INTUITIVE LEARNING DEN and browse all the helpful packs that help families with all things emotional wellbeing.
Which one is the best one to start with?
It doesn’t matter. What matters most is that you JUST START!
There’s NO change without action. There will always be a reason not to. There will always be something else which is a priority. You will never find a good time if you’re afraid. Your fear will keep you stuck.
So, what exactly is the true cost of your child’s happiness?
It’s frustrating too many people fail to realise the importance of preventative maintenance – – think of it like an insurance policy for future happiness. Here are 8 preventative measures you can take today!
Long term, what is the cost of ignoring a child’s basic need?
They need emotional intelligence more than they need an education. The evidence is very clear to me.
So whilst you can’t put a price on it, it’s VERY VERY serious food for thought ….