Out with the old, in with the new!

Like fashion, some areas of your life can be sooo last year sweetie daaaaarrrrrrling.

If fashion is an analogy of your life and what was en vogue last year will no longer be this year, you may want to have a bit of a re-think.  A de-clutter.  A make-over even!  As 2015 begins, it may be an idea to rid yourself of anything:

1) You’ve outgrown

Are you sticking with something or somebody out of loyalty, history or habit?  Maybe it’s your job.  It’s not challenging you and you can do it with your eyes closed.  Or worse still, you dread going to work every day and would rather hit the snooze button 10 times before dragging yourself out of bed.   What about people?  Old friends with whom sadly you have nothing in common with or perhaps you are at different life stages.  You may want to look at which of your relationships are still nourishing you  and see if it’s time to move on.

2) Bobbly or Shabby

Oooh fashion faux pas.  Bobbly or shabby is not a good look.  No matter how much you convince yourself that it is.  It’s not who you are – is it?  Shabby or bobbly.  Shabby Chic doesn’t count!  You tell yourself it looks good but really you know it isn’t.  In relation to your life this could be any addictions, bad habits.  I’m sure you know what I’m talking about.  You convince yourself it’s perfectly OK, but somewhere deep down inside, you know it isn’t.  Smoking was never cool, isn’t now and never will be.  It kills you.  I’m writing that for me as I’m 3 years  in to my recovery.

3) That is too small for you

Mmm shoes that pinch and bras that chafe.  Jeans that you have to lie on the bed to do up.  Camel toe anybody?  Come on I know they are your favourites, but they are uncomfortable.  Bit like those people in your life who aren’t in alignment with your values, who hurt you, who disrespect you, who you tolerate because you tell yourself that they are not that bad really.  How much do they have to hurt you before you realise they are bad.  How much do you have to keep expecting them to change before you realise that they may never?

Sometimes, when you’re in pain and you have been for so long, it becomes part of who you are.  I believe though that deep deep down you know you are in pain.  Before long, your body will tell you that you are anyway.  That something’s off.  Not quite right.  Maybe it’s the fear of not knowing exactly what it is that is stopping you from going there. Nothing can be more painful than living in pain.  Whatever is on the other side has to be less painful than where you are now.

3) You’re saving for a special occasion

There is a well-known story about a lady who saved her finest underwear in a drawer all her life.  It was for ‘best’ and she kept it for ‘best.’  Sadly, the only time she ever wore this fine silky underwear was the day of her funeral.  Saving clothes for best or for special occasions that may never happen.  Living too far in the future or forever in the past does not a happy person make.  Living in the now and making the most of what we have today is what counts.

5) That’s from the 1980s

So it was trendy the first time around but let’s leave it to the kids this time around (except for my hair which is not an 80s perm but totally natural!) Who you were then, is not the same person that you are today.  You’ve experienced some of life’s rich tapestry, you’ve lived out your dream, you’ve experienced new places, people and learnt new skills.  You haven’t?  Why haven’t you?  What else is there left in your life you would like to do?

6) That somebody else bought for you

You don’t wear it, however you keep it because it has sentimental value (more like you feel too guilty to throw it away)  It’s something somebody else thinks you will look good in.  Not what you think you will look good in.  Sometimes, it’s difficult and yet much more authentic to be independent of the good opinions of other people.  What somebody else thinks is right for you, maybe not be what you want from your life.  You are living the life you chose then are you?  Not the one that somebody else mapped out for you?

7) You deserve the best and can have the best

If you wanted the most exclusive and high brow fashion, you would shop in Harrods right?  Or maybe Prada or Gucci?  I quite fancy a pair of Manolo Blahniks a la Carrie Bradshaw in Sex and the City.  A bit like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman – she went to Rodeo Drive to shop and nobody would help her because she didn’t believe she belonged there.  Do it now!  Say to yourself, ‘I deserve the best and I’m going to have the best!’

8) This year, please come out of the closet!

Mmmm well not literally, that’s just a play on words I think (unless of course you feel you want to). Start 2015 by shaking it all up.  Who knows where it’s going to land?  That’s the fun part.  The exciting discovery of creating a new life.  One that you really want.  Out with the old and in with the new.

Love Smiley x

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