If I could bottle confidence and give it to your child every morning like a gigantic shot of Calpol that perked them up when they had lost their way, we could all breathe a sigh of relief. That’s all we want for our children isn’t it? That they grow up into happy healthy confident adults who know where they are going in life?
When you think about it, that is my job really: Giving children the tools to be their very best selves. Although my way is not in a bottle and it’s definitely not medicinal. It is, however,  easily accessible and quite remarkable.

For children, the world is still a magical place

So that makes my job a little bit easier. If you’ve been to one of my workshops before, you will know that creativity, fun and games play a huge part. Look at all the lovely artwork that’s posted on Facebook after every workshop. This is the best way for us to learn: when we are relaxed and enjoying ourselves. Children are great at being in the moment too so their enjoyment levels soar as they soak it all up.
Last month, 6 children attended my first Giddy Up Your Confidence workshop at The Holistic Horse and Pony Centre in Ockham.  I’ve already experienced the beauty and wonder of this place. You can read about how a horse became my mirror reflecting my negative self beliefs here or you can read about how being with the horses helped me set boundaries here. Something that seems to be my life’s work and quite useful if you are a parent.
“Setting boundaries doesn’t make me mean. Considering your wishes doesn’t mean I should do what you think I should do.  My feelings and thoughts are part of the decision. And if you don’t like it that belongs to you.” ~knowyourworth.com
The day started with goal setting which the children seemed to find quite easy. Wendy asked each one what they would like to receive from the day. Wendy Price who runs the stables is incredibly kind and welcoming. As a group, we decided we all wanted to have fun, learn more about the horses and feel comfortable around the bigger ones. Then individually we looked at feeling more confident in different situations. As with most of my other workshops, the most common ones came up:-
  •  Around a bully in the playground
  • Reading in front of the class
  • Feeling less nervous about taking exams
  • Feeling more comfortable about meeting new people and going to new places


Armed with our goals, we went to get fitted out for a hat and then chose a pony to groom.

The horses have their own individual personalities and names which reflect that. Which one is your favourite: Minnie, Bounty, Galaxy, Able, Emmie or Smartie? Smartie was a little pickle and we gave him to the least confident child so she could step into her power and show him who is the boss.

Not all of the children had been horse riding before but I was amazed at how one child quickly went from tentatively brushing their pony to standing really close and tugging the knots out of its mane.

As we groomed, the horses merrily munched on their hay bales and we learnt how to pick up a horses hoof, why we need to leave a big space when we walk behind a horse and that horses rest standing up. These horses roam in fields and are not stable kept which means that one of them will stay awake and keep watch while the others get their 40 winks.

Winning confidence is a state of mind which can be learnt

Making our way from the stables to the riding school on our smartly groomed ponies, we concentrated on sitting up straight and smiling. I chatted to the children and reassured them while Wendy lead the way. Once inside, we got our horses moving by using our minds. Yes that’s right. There was no tugging of reigns or kicking. We simply thought about a stop sign in our heads and set our intention to stop the horse when we wanted to halt. When we wanted to get moving again we raised our energy. Look at us go!

With that kind of thinking, anything is possible

The key to inner confidence is much easier than most people think. It’s down to the way we think and see the world. The way we think impacts how we feel about ourselves and in turn how we behave. If we think the world is a big scary place that is out to get us, we will attract more of the same. However, if we see the beauty and magic where ever we go, we will see more of that too. The Law of Attraction is truly magical and I wish I had tapped into this when I was growing up. How do you see the world?

Once the children knew their minds were this powerful, everything seemed fixable. You could see it in their faces, their puffed out chests and big smiley faces. We continued with some gentle races and then we returned to the yard to revisit the goals we had set earlier. How empowered were we? Just from that short time with our horse, we realised that if we choose to think differently, we could become more confident or handle any tricky situation. Back at the yard, we said goodbye to our horses and returned them to their fields.

We could think ourselves confident, capable, calm and controlled

Dealing with our bullies became thinking ourselves 2 foot taller and much stronger. Learning to set boundaries and saying no to people means we can keep ourselves safe and secure without an adult. You really can think yourself to be what it is you want to be. Such an empowering message for children to learn. Something you can give to your children is encourage confidence in them. Have a look at my 10-Easy Steps that I wrote for Mummy Pages and see if there is anything helpful in there. You are probably doing lots of these things already.

The Secret Ingredients of Self Confidence

If you are interested please get in touch or sign up to my newsletter which will keep you up to date with new workshop dates. Or come on over to Facebook where we have a big community of Mums who want to get their best out of the children and help boost their child’s emotional intelligence.

For those of you who would rather keep your feet firmly on the ground, I am running my Secret Ingredients of Self Confidence workshop on Sunday 4th September and Sunday 18th September at 10am. Click here to book your place.


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