There is usually a catalyst which sparks off Smiley Coaching. Weekly, I get calls about:-
- bullying (mostly by exclusion, on social media or with a lack of school support)
- conflict (friends, parents, siblings)
- exam and homework stress (can we please ban homework? we don’t need it)
- transitioning to a new school or a new class
- separation anxiety (I wrote a juicy blog about that – it’s in two parts so you might want to pour yourself a cuppa)
- going away on a residential trip (see above on separation anxiety)
- sleepless nights and worries What are the top 3 worries I see in my coaching room every week?
- panic attacks and fear of dogs, dying and being sick
- loss (pets, Grandparents, parents, friends)
- tween and teen troubles – rebellion, boyfriends, body changes, crushes, decisions about Uni or working life
If you are reading this thinking ‘Crikey what is the world coming to?’
Yep, sadly, it has come to this. Our children need us and lots of them are facing everyday struggles which aren’t going to go away. It doesn’t look like this busy life is going to slow down for us or our children any time soon.
If you are new here, don’t let that put you off
I’d rather people didn’t call me in crisis and you can read about that in my blog post I’m Not Just the Girl You Call In An Emergency. Except I am. Life happens that way. I like to see coaching as more of a preventative measure and a toolkit of life skills which will stay with them forever and make growing up easier.
If you are reading this thinking , I’d like to speak to you Lisa
You can! It’s easy. You can access my diary and bag yourself a free 20 minute Clarity Call right here.
Maybe you are on the cusp and undecided
Or you have noticed something which is nagging away at you. How do you know if your child would benefit and is ready for coaching? Let me see if I can help you with that.
Does it surprise you to read that often parents and children have different priorities and agendas when it comes to this kind of stuff? That’s why it’s really important how you address it with them and that you involve them in the process. If you want help with that, download a copy of my Coaching FAQs document which tells you how and will answer most questions parents aren’t sure about.
Here are some signs that they are definitely not ready:
- You keep talking to your child about it and they walk off, get angry or shut down
- You are obsessed with getting them to see sense (back to you: what is this bringing up for you?)
- They don’t think they need help (is this an issue for them or for you?)
- They refuse to come to coaching or you have to bribe them
- They don’t want to talk about their ‘problem’ because it’s making them feel bad (of course it is but it’s obviously not bad enough to do anything about it)
- They are defensive or feel criticised when you try to address it
All these signs indicate that your child is afraid of change. Be patient and calm with them. Let them know they have a choice.
Here are some signs that coaching may be needed:
- They are stressed (read my post 10 Obvious Signs of A Stressed Child that Parents Often Ignore)
- They are off their food, not sleeping or having big emotional meltdowns more so than normal
- They feel lonely or like they don’t belong
- They are clingy, want to stay at home and won’t do their usual activities
- You are getting feedback from the school that something is troubling your child or their learning is suffering
- They are refusing to go to school (don’t enable this behaviour, hold your boundaries even when it’s hard and talk to the school about what can be done to make this easier for your child)
Here are some signs that they are ready:
- They are open to trying something new and they want things to change
- They are curious and when you suggest watching my You Tube Channel to discover together, they smile
- They have asked for help
If you are not sure, as I said earlier, have a look at my diary. Book yourself in a free Clarity Call and we can work it out.